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Nov. 1st, 2000 05:28 pmI'm a news junkie. Lately, given the election, I've been finding it hard to watch television news because my voice is getting sore from yelling at the TV. My forehead is also getting sore from smacking my hand into it repeatedly. I don't think it's just me, I'm sure libertarians, democrats, republicans, socialists, communists, greenies, reformers, reformers mark 2, nazis, and any other political niche or flavor are just as annoyed at what seems like media bias in every other story. [I actually laughed out loud like a maniac the other day when an extremely liberal democratic politician was complaining about the media's "obvious right-wing pandering". It was either laugh or put another dent in my forehead]. Less than a week until the media can start sucking up to the new boss(es), then maybe things will get back to normal again and us Americans can poke our heads out of our shells and see if the world has imploded while we were busy (I kinda doubt it, but you gotta keep on top of these things. Who else would buy all those Brittney Spears albums?)
As an aside off of an aside, I've never been a fan of Brittney. Not only her "music" which is obviously a few parsecs from the habitat of my normal taste, but of her 'look', either. I may be selling out my Y-Chromosome, but the ditzy blonde 18-year-old thing never really turned me on. I've always prefered women (if the term can be loosely applied to Brittney) to be obviously intelligent and a bit closer to my own age, which, while not ancient, is approaching twice hers. However, I saw one of those cardboard cutouts of her in the grocery store the other day and the cutout was about 5' tall. Is she really that short, or did they shrink her for marketing purposes? I must admit, we all have some standard of beauty or sexual attractiveness that is completely illogical for long-term committed relationship potential, but still turns the hormones on like a leaf-blower in an office park. Some guys like tits, some like legs--I can relate to those, but I've always been a sucker for petite. But I digress.
The News. So, after exhausing The Onion for laugh potential, I've still been left with an empty craving for what's going on in the world. CNN is a good web source -- you can always click past the stories that bug you, but even though CNN Online is more neutral than the Cable channel, there are still stories that miss the site. So, I hop over to The Drudge Report to check out the latest scandels. Drudge is always good for a tip on a story that the mainstream media is trying to bury, but lately his site seems to be one big mud-slinging leak after another. I get the impression that he isn't discovering stories as much as political opponents are using him to air out stuff they wouldn't say through normal media channels. They know he'll print it. So, I pop over to Ananova, the sexiest computer simulated anchorcyberbeing ever created. Even though she is a British construct and has an American accent. At least the news is interesting because it's from an international viewpoint. But, it seems the UK has the same Socialist vs. Hawk political extremes. What's a news junkie to do? I'm glad you asked. For the next week, I'll probably be getting my news at the "The Only News That's Worth Watching" -- The Naked News!. That's right, who cares about political bickering or media bias when cute naked chicks are delivering the news, sports, and weather. And, coming soon to the same website, a choice of cute naked hunky boys to give the ladies (and some other flavors of boys) something to watch.
As an aside off of an aside, I've never been a fan of Brittney. Not only her "music" which is obviously a few parsecs from the habitat of my normal taste, but of her 'look', either. I may be selling out my Y-Chromosome, but the ditzy blonde 18-year-old thing never really turned me on. I've always prefered women (if the term can be loosely applied to Brittney) to be obviously intelligent and a bit closer to my own age, which, while not ancient, is approaching twice hers. However, I saw one of those cardboard cutouts of her in the grocery store the other day and the cutout was about 5' tall. Is she really that short, or did they shrink her for marketing purposes? I must admit, we all have some standard of beauty or sexual attractiveness that is completely illogical for long-term committed relationship potential, but still turns the hormones on like a leaf-blower in an office park. Some guys like tits, some like legs--I can relate to those, but I've always been a sucker for petite. But I digress.
The News. So, after exhausing The Onion for laugh potential, I've still been left with an empty craving for what's going on in the world. CNN is a good web source -- you can always click past the stories that bug you, but even though CNN Online is more neutral than the Cable channel, there are still stories that miss the site. So, I hop over to The Drudge Report to check out the latest scandels. Drudge is always good for a tip on a story that the mainstream media is trying to bury, but lately his site seems to be one big mud-slinging leak after another. I get the impression that he isn't discovering stories as much as political opponents are using him to air out stuff they wouldn't say through normal media channels. They know he'll print it. So, I pop over to Ananova, the sexiest computer simulated anchorcyberbeing ever created. Even though she is a British construct and has an American accent. At least the news is interesting because it's from an international viewpoint. But, it seems the UK has the same Socialist vs. Hawk political extremes. What's a news junkie to do? I'm glad you asked. For the next week, I'll probably be getting my news at the "The Only News That's Worth Watching" -- The Naked News!. That's right, who cares about political bickering or media bias when cute naked chicks are delivering the news, sports, and weather. And, coming soon to the same website, a choice of cute naked hunky boys to give the ladies (and some other flavors of boys) something to watch.
